Like the Queen Mary and the Titanic before it, this Website is about to set sail on a fantastic journey that will undoubtedly yield a vast mother-load of untold riches, riches much like those of multi-millionaires who dive into dollar sign-shaped swimming pools containing water sprinkled with a fine gold dust (if you don’t believe me look at any Richie Rich comic book).
Unlike other websites, however, I don’t sell wicker furniture, although at one time I did own a crocheted vest that seemed to invoke the very powers of the devil. I don’t have a MySpace page, nor do I have any plans on getting one in the future, I’ll leave that to people under 25 years of age, or people who wish that they were under 25 years of age but are, in reality, 43 and desperately alone, living in their parents basement, playing Supertramp over and over, wondering where it all went wrong. I know of no magic potions that will enhance the size of your penis (or your vagina, as the case may be) nor do I know the best way to consolidate your debt by buying muskrats in bulk.
That said, there are wonders to be had here, most of which involve apes of various pelt-grades.